I was lost in the swirling mist of random assignments – a novel cover, some writing, and a few caricatures.
While randomness rules, here are a few random caricatures that I collected from the past :)
I was lost in the swirling mist of random assignments – a novel cover, some writing, and a few caricatures.
While randomness rules, here are a few random caricatures that I collected from the past :)
Can you hear the battle cry?
Try harder and you should be able to hear the battle cry of Alexander’s troops as they ready themselves to attack India’s North-western frontier – Gandhar, or the present day Afghanistan (capital: Kandahar); if you press your ear to the ground, you might even hear the clappity-clap of the horse-hooves; and if you have a discerning ear, you should also be able to hear the snores of his tired soldiers, randomly punctuated by mysterious thuds. These thuds, in fact, were caused by the sleepy soldiers who fell off their horses, every once in a while.
You couldn’t hear a thing?
Let me tell you what happened. Though Alexander’s tired and sleepy troops could defeat King Porus yet the battle cost them their energy and their enthusiasm and they couldn’t reach the richer kingdoms of India. This is precisely why Alexander’s headgear didn’t have a golden plume in it. But the birds didn’t know that – do they?
Here’s Alexander the Great on his return journey WITHOUT the Golden Feather from the Golden Bird called India.(Sorry about the color of the web-page – I’d have preferred Golden, but who listens to me…sniff!)
Tradition Dictates that I provide a crisp summary of Alexander’s life, and who am I to question traditions – so, here’s it.
Alexander was born the son of Olympias and Philip, in the Summer of 356 BC. By virtue of being born the son of the previous king, he became the king of Macedon when he turned 20. However, Alexander wanted more. This could partially be attributed to his genetic makeup as his mom Olympias was an extremely ambitious lady, and also partially to his tutor Aristotle (wonder why I feel the need to bring Aristotle in? Perhaps because had he not taught Geography to Alexander, he wouldn’t have been able to plan right.)
Let me not dawdle and come straight to the point. Alexander didn’t sit still after he became the king of Macedon. Without further ado, he got his army together, and marched eastwards. He attacked country after country after country, and after annexing many such countries he established an empire that stretched all the way from Macedon and Egypt in the west to the north-western frontier of India (Gandhara) in the east. The fact that the empire didn’t last long after his death, is often not talked about much – so I won’t talk about it either.
If you want a list of his conquests, please visit the following links.
According to legend, Alexander was a gift from God (to the Macedonian royal family, of course – not to those countless families whose sons died in the wars he waged for 12 long years. Ever wonder why God always appears to favor royalty?)
Oh, I strayed. So why was Alexander considered to be gift from God? Well, mainly because his mom (the cunning Olympias who slept with snakes – Nancy, I hope you read this,) and his dad (who loved to get drunk and was an octa-wiferian) both had funny dreams when he was in his mom’s womb. In a manner of speaking, the rumor-mill of those days spewed rumors that Alexander was conceived through divine intervention. Poor Philip. He did all the hard-work, didn’t he?
Alexander’s mom was a busy lady (she had to bathe and feed the snakes, I presume) and so dear darling baby Alexander was raised by a nurse. As I’ve written in my previous post, when Alex was 10, his dad made a thoughtless remark to his son – and that remark changed the destinies of thousands.
I think we should consider it Alexander’s personal matter and drop it. I mean what difference does it make to us? And do you know why we ask this question? Because poor Alexander had a severe Oedipal complex and he wasn’t all that interested in women. Big deal! I refuse to talk more on this topic, but if you are so keen on finding out whether Alexander was gay or not, please click here.
Perhaps so. With a pretty princess called Roxanne and he also married her. Alexander married only twice. Once for love and then for political reasons.
Porus is the guy who was instrumental in making Alexander and his troops turn back. According to historical texts, Alexander’s troops were suffering from a loss of morale and they were tired of the apparently endless stream of battles that they had to fight. Yet, I believe otherwise. I think that Alexander had to turn back because he came up against the fiercest warriors of India – people from the region of Punjab. Porus or Paurush, as I’d like to call him, was the king of Purus, who were the Punjabis of the year 326 BC. This Wikipedia entry (I know that you know better, but I couldn’t find a link to your article on this subject) tells us that the lineage of Purus could have survived as the Puris of today. So if you are a Puri, you can be proud of stopping Alexander’s invasion of India.
In midst of all this, I forgot to tell you that Porus was able to thwart Alexander’s plans just by being himself. He had lost the battle but when Alexander asked him how he’d like to be treated, Porus said, “treat me the way one king treats another.” Now, if nothing else proves that Porus was a Punjabi, that does – doesn’t it? (Ask a Punjabi to find out.)
I must stop now…really – or I’d end up writing a long nonsensical story, which’d be typical of me – your very own crazy caricaturist :)
Does the earth go around the sun or does the sun go around the earth?
You know the answer and I know it – but 500 years ago, neither of us would’ve known it, and even if we did, we wouldn’t have the nerve to say it; and if at all we had the conviction and the nerve, we would be Galileo Galilei!
The caricaturist humbly presents the caricature of one of the most important men in astronomy and science.
So who was this man? And what did he do to go down in history as the man who defied the authority of the Roman Catholic Church?
Here’s Galileo’s tiniest biography on the web.
Galileo was born in Pisa on February 15, 1564. His dad was a musician who decided that his son Galileo must become a Doctor (possibly as Doctors are never out of work, the way musicians are – and because even then they earned rather well.) As it happens with most sons, Galileo didn’t want to a Doctor, so despite his dad sending him to the University of Pisa to study medicine, he became a Professor of Mathematics.
Galileo’s first important invention was the telescope, which made faraway objects appear closer…and Galileo got hooked into using it to spy on the moon. To the chagrin of lovers world-wide, Galileo discovered and made it known that the surface of the moon was pimply, wrinkly, and not at all smooth and beautiful – thus, he robbed many romantic relationships of their lunar poetry.
He also discovered a myriad other things, but what literally made his world go round n round, was the discovery that Earth indeed revolved around the Sun. This obviously didn’t go down well with the church who’d been preaching otherwise for hundreds of years. So Galileo was accused of being a heretic (a non-believer in the teachings of the Church,) but Galileo managed to get himself cleared of the charges. Yet, he was barred from stating the truth, because the Church didn’t want to be proved wrong in front of the whole world!
Galileo however became more and more convinced of the fact, and then he published a book “Dialogues concerning the Two Great World Systems” that re-affirmed the Copernican Heliocentric Theory. The Church could take his blatant disregard for their authority anymore and they incarcerated him in his own house. He stayed imprisoned for 9 years, until he died in 1642, at the age of 88.
In 1992, Galileo was finally “pardoned” by the Roman Catholic Church. Unbelievable but true. After taking away 9 years of a man’s life for their own error, they “pardon” him! I would think that an organization that committed such a mistake should seek a pardon instead. (I really can’t comprehend it – but then I am not the smartest person in this world – there must be some reason why the entire world accepts this…and I bow to the opinion of the majority.)
Among other things, he discovered that there are other planets that have their personal moons, and that gravity isn’t partial to heavier objects.
I know that this is merely tip of the iceberg of Galileo’s accomplishments, so click here to read more.
Presenting Joseph Stalin, the 5 feet 5 inches tall giant, who was born on December 18, 1878, “ruled” the USSR for 12 long years, was lauded for his achievements, ridiculed for his foibles, and criticized for his harshness!
Stalin was born in a cobbler’s family in 1878. His early life gave him scars that’d stay with him for life, permanently etching into his mind a severe inferiority complex. First, he contracted smallpox (other kids teased him by calling him “Pocky” – in Russian, of course), then he damaged his left hand in a couple of accidents. Though initially he was a good student he gradually moved away from studies ans got into politics. It was in 1903, that a 25-year-old Stalin formally became a Bolshevik.
Joseph Stalin fought the Tzar’s regime and actively participated in the October revolution of 1917. During the Civil war that followed the October revolution, Stalin first experienced the feeling of unbridled power over people when he sent the Tzar’s followers to execution.
was Losif Vissarionovich Dzhugashvili!
He called himself Stalin (or “made of steel”) - a good thing he did – or it would’ve been nearly impossible to remember his name.
Stalin shared a love-hate relationship with Lenin. Stalin had joined the Bolshevik forces headed by Vladimir Lenin, in 1903 when he was a young man. Over the next twenty years, as Stalin’s importance grew within the party, his differences with Lenin grew too. In 1922, Lenin suffered a stroke, and Stalin became the General Secretary in his stead, and also his personal advisory. However, their relationship worsened during this period as Lenin thought of Stalin as rude abuser of power. This of course, didn’t matter, as Lenin died two years later, and Stalin assumed complete authority.
During Stalin’s time, it had become dangerous for people to publicly proclaim that they were religious. Atheism was the in-thing, and priests, nuns etc. were killed in thousands. It wasn’t just the Christians who were persecuted but the followers of all other religions. Ironically, Stalin supported Islam elsewhere in the world.
But what is really ironical is something else. Believe it or not, Stalin was nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize in 1948 (for his work towards ending the second world war – however, the guy who nominated him forgot that Stalin had first entered a “peace pact” with Hitler and only when Hitler reneged on his promise did Stalin began supporting the allies.) Thank God he didn’t get it!
Stalin died in the October of 1953. His death was as much a subject of speculation as was his life. Some researchers believe that he was poisoned, others think that he died of an ailment caused by his being an incessant smoker. Whatever it was, his death generated a mix of extreme and opposing emotions.
Stalin’s regime is often described as brutal and tyrannical and the description holds true for the manner in which he treated his family.
It is said that Stalin is responsible for the industrialization of the USSR through the five-year plans. However, he achieved this by destroying free enterprise and establishing collectives. This plunged the USSR into poverty and misery and millions died of starvation.He is also thought to be the man responsible for improving the state of the Russian Intelligence.
Stalin is infamous for “purging” the Soviet Union of the enemies (people of foreign ethnicity – Germans, Poles, etc), people who had committed the flimsiest of errors that could be re-painted as an offence, and so on). Researchers tell us that 700,000 people were executed under his regime, and he himself has been said to have signed the killing orders for about 40,000 of them. This guy, note, this guy was nominated for a Nobel Prize!
Fascinating – aren’t they?
I am writing this post from the past. It’s the year 1962 and John F. Kennedy is still alive and making merry with Marilyn Monroe. America is completed bowled over by this boyishly handsome young President and his pretty, petite, and stylish wife Jacqueline Kennedy. They love the couple - ( the men secretly admire John F. Kennedy’s exploits while the women sympathize with the First Lady?) In other words, everything appears to be in order, and exactly as this caricaturist would like it to be – happy, romantic, mushy, and adulterous!
Here’s the caricature of this tragedy-stricken, handsome child of destiny. Presenting John Fitzgerald “Jack” Kennedy the 35th President of the United States.
Tradition demands that I share JFK’s short and cute biography here. So here I go.
JFK or John F. Kennedy or “Jack” Kennedy was born in a politically active family on May 29, 1917. John suffered from various health issues from a very early age. The effect of his health on his attitude was compounded by his elder brother Joe’s achievements overshadowing his own. All this (and possibly more) made John something of a rebel when he was at school. After school he spent a mysterious month at the London School of Economics, later returning to study at Princeton University. (Note that the well-to-do, rich and connected Americans of those times, preferred to educate their kids abroad! There’s some glamor to this education abroad thing – isn’t there?) Anyway, JFK was a good student and he ended up at Harvard, where he completed his thesis as the age of 23, published it as a book, which quickly became a best seller.
After completing his education, JFK wanted to join the Army but couldn’t because he had some serious issues with his lower-back. Instead, he ended up joining the US Navy. (Wikipedia says that the “influence” (also called push or jugaad) of a senior Military guy was used to get him in the Navy – but then the ends are always more important than the means – and I am sure that Nixon’s election intelligence team must’ve gone into the nitty-grity of this whole affair and everything must’ve been found in order…so, I’ll not dig deeper into it. John married Jacqueline in 1952. The next few years were fraught with back problems and he had to undergo a few surgeries to have them corrected. It was in 1957 that he received the Pulitzer prize for a collection of biographies that he wrote and published about those US senators who risked their careers for their personal believes.
Anyway, one thing led to another, and JFK’s bravery made him save quite a few lives despite his back problems. Lives saved leads to medals earned (at least in the US they do.) (When I open my third eye (the one that belongs to the caricaturist in me) I see the entire Kennedy family moving in the living room to make room for his medals.) All this and more, including his brother’s untimely death, steered him towards the president-ship, and he became the 35th President of the US in 1961.
In 1960 he stood for the Presidential elections again Richard Nixon, the Republican candidate (who later became the 37th President of the US). Theirs was the first presidential debate to have every been televised and, it is said that had it not been televised, history would’ve been different. People who hadn’t yet bought the idiot-box were happily listening to the debate on radio, and they favored Nixon, but those who watched the tv telecast of the debates found Kennedy a lot more charming and confident. (Who says looks don’t matter?)
Read more about the post-election politics here.
JFK’s assassination is possibly the most widely remembered event of his presidency. Three years into his term JFK was on a political trip to Texas, when a man called Lee Harvey Oswald shot him in the neck and the back. Oswald was killed by Ruby two days after the assassination. The crime remains unsolved to date.
It is said the JFK was quite keen on the Hollywood Glamor Queen, the inimitable skirt-swirling, drug-doing Marilyn Monroe. However, his close friends, confidantes, and others at the White House chose to stay quiet about his affairs (possibly to spare the pain such knowledge would cause his wife and to avoid the damage that it could do to his image in public…and of course, they didn’t want to scare away the future Presidents – notably Bill Clinton.)
At his inaugural address on 20th January, 1961, Kennedy challenged the people of the United States with the statement: “Ask not what your country can do for you, but rather what you can do for your country.” Guess it’s time for everyone around the world to be asking the same question…isn’t it?
Most of the regular readers of this blog are aware that this caricaturist is obsessed with Time Travel.
This September, I shall take another trip into the past. I shall break my journey in the medieval Europe, the post-independence America, and the pre-Cold-War USSR. I will, of course, be updating the blog on a regular basis and so you can expect to see faces of people who helped shape this world into the chaotic amorphous mass of humanity that it is now.
I can hear loud gasps of disbelief from the well-meaning friendly visitors of this blog. “Not again!” “This caricaturist is crazy.” “She doesn’t know what’s good for her.” “She’ll kill herself on this trip.” “We’ll never see her again.”…and so on…and I can also hear an occasional sigh of relief lined with hopes of a better, caricature-free tomorrow, “Who knows, her Time Machine may develop a fault once again, and she may not return at all,” and “medieval Europe? She’s an engineer – she’ll be burnt on the stake for being a witch. Thank god for small mercies!”
Whatever it is – my dear readers, I promise to return. I am carrying enough fuel for three round-trips and if at all a never-before encountered fault occurs in my Time Machine, I’ll browse the web for its solution. I have also subscribed to a five-year pre-paid Internet plan, and so I’ll stay in touch with you, and continue to update this blog regularly :)
Did you hear that?
Oh well. Disregard and Discard!
See you soon :)
I’ve updated the Caricature Gallery with new caricatures in almost all sections. If you’ve begun to visit my blog recently, you might not have seen the caricatures that I’ve uploaded since November 2010, as they were not there in the Gallery until now.
The Celebrity Caricatures that have been added to the gallery include:
The additions to the gallery also include:
So please visit the Caricature Gallery to view the recent additions (which appear towards the end of each section.)
Julius Caesar was born on the thirteenth of July, 100 BC – just about 2110 years ago. You know him as the guy from Shakespeare’s drama Julius Caesar, in which he dramatically cries out “et tu Brute!” before he dies; as the Egyptian Queen Cleopatra’s Roman paramour; and as the untiring pursuer of the fearless Gauls in the famous Asterix comics.
Here’s Julius Caesar with his Laurel Wreath and two butterflies auditing the quality of the wreath.
Caesar was born in a noble but poor family. His wasn’t a typical rags-to-riches saga, but he did have a tough life. At 16 he was heading his family, at 17 he became the high priest of Jupiter for which he had to break off his engagement and get married to another girl from a noble family; and then before he turned 21, he was forced to go into hiding because Sulla, the then dictator of Rome was weeding out the potential threats. Caesar’s mom’s family had to pull some strings to get him a pardon – after which Caesar joined the army.Only when Sulla died, Caesar returned to Rome.
Caesar came back poor and had to stay in a lower-class neighborhood (slums?) As he still had to put food on his rickety table, he decided to become a lawyer. One thing led to another (as it always does in stories that become too long to tell,) and in 60 BC he won the election and became a consul (whatever that means – if you know, please feel free to enlighten me.)
Caesar’s first wife Cornelia died in 69 BC. He then married Pompeia. She was suspected of having an affair with a guy who had a really complex name. the chauvinist Caesar didn’t approve of it at all – “Caesar’s wife should be above all suspicion,” he said in Roman – and divorced Pompeia. About 10 years later, he married Calpurnia to further his political career. Eventually, he discovered Cleopatra and he had an extra-marital affair with her.
Cleopatra the ruler of Egypt met Caesar when she was already onto her second husband (who was also her younger brother) Ptolemy 14th!
(Wow! Those guys were super-creative when it came to naming their children…it must have something to do with the royal inbreeding program followed by the Egyptian royalty.)
Nevertheless, she decked herself up in a rug and met Caesar and they went for a long cruise on Nile – a lot of interesting things might’ve happened between them and some say that Cleopatra conceived Caesarion, their son, while they were bobbing up and down on the Nile. Though they say that J and C were crazy about each other, I’d say that Cleo was just trying to get some political mileage out of her relationship with Julius – or why would she land in Mark Antony’s lap the moment Caesar cried “Et tu Brutus”?
If you are completely nuts and you want to read more about JC and Cleo’s mushy love-life, check out the following two links:
Caesar’s relationship with the Gauls could be described as troubled at best (source: Asterix Comics:)) He had brought the whole Gaul under his control and converted it into Roman territory, save one tiny little village, where Asterix and Obelix lived. His army was scared of the two Gauls, because they had the magic potion that Druid Getafix used to fix for them (and as a child, Obelix had fallen into a cauldron of the magic potion – I hope that the potion had cooled down when he fell into it.)
Once again, to cut a long story short – you need to pick an Asterix comic to understand it completely…or you might want to get in touch with Albert Uderzo, who in my opinion, is the best comic book illustrator and cartoonist in this world.
Caesar’s popularity and his re-election as the dictator of Rome for the third time in succession led to a strong wave of jealousy among the senators. About 40 senators stabbed him to death in the Theater of Pompei. With his death, the Roman Republic died to give way to an empire, with Caesar’s adopted son Octavian becoming the emperor.
I guess this is all that I want to tell you about Caesar…and his butterflies.
There two important quotes that should be mentioned here.
Et tu brute! : This phrase literally means, “You too Brutus!” You should exclaim “Et tu brute” when someone you trust cheats on you. For instance, if your dog bites you. This phrase should never be used when your politicians cheat you, because you’d be a fool to trust your politicians.
Caesar’s wife should be above suspicion: This phrase means, people who are connected to people who have an image to cultivate, should not have ghosts in their cupboards. Example:? (Can you see me scratching my head…I too would need a laurel wreath soon.) Please feel free to add an example to the comments section:)
Who is more evil – Adolf Hitler or the Devil?
Adolf Hitler, the Nazi Dictator and the chief perpetrator of the Holocaust, was born on April 20th, 1889 (a black day that year) in Austria. Hitler didn’t do well in school and while his father dreamed of his becoming a government employee, he wanted to be an artist. He tried getting into the Vienna Academy of Fine Arts, but the selectors out there weren’t much impressed by his drawings. They did suggest that he could try becoming an architect (his architectural drawings were indeed better than the other stuff he did.) Unfortunately, his qualifications fell short of what was required for studying architecture.
To cut a long story short, Hitler worked on some menial jobs for a while and then he joined the German Army. It was in 1919, when a 32-year-old Hitler discovered that he has the gift of gab. Hitler’ audience often comprised rowdy thugs, but they gave him the confidence to launch the National Socialist German Workers or NAZI Party in 1920. In 1932, the NAZI party was democratically elected as the largest party, and in 1933, Hitler gained complete control of the party.
Then began the worst nightmare the world had ever seen. By 1945, the Nazis had systematically murdered 17 Million Civilians including 6 Million Jews. Other communities that were targeted by the hatred-driven Nazis were Poles, Russians, Romanis, and even people who were disabled. The atrocities that were committed by Hitler’s satanic army remain unparalleled in history. If there truly were a devil, he would bow to Hitler and abdicate in his favor!
It’s often argued that Hitler had Jewish blood in his veins. His grandmother worked in a rich Jewish household and conceived Alois, Hitler’s father, through the one of the male members of this family. Five years after giving birth to Alois, she married Johann Georg Hiedler (or Hitler) who gave Alois his name. There’s a possibility that Hitler’s hatred for Jews was a lot personal than he ever accepted it to be.
Hitler fell in love with an Army Officer’s daughter when he was young, but her never had the nerve to speak to her. He did follow her around for a long time. In 1929, he met Eva Braun, a 17-year old starry-eyed teenager. Hitler didn’t marry Eva until two days before they committed suicide together in 1945.
Going by what sells in the name of art today, Hitler was a better artist than most. Unfortunately for the world, he was a better orator. In addition to being a great orator, Hitler was a man with no conscience nor empathy for his fellow beings – yet he was passionate about whatever he did – even when he killed – he killed with passion. You can see Hitler’s artwork here. (Do you notice the irony? Had this man become an artist and had been able to sell his drawings, he probably wouldn’t have become a butcher; yet, because he became the dirtiest butcher in the world, his drawings now sell!)
Hitler loved dogs – especially German Shepherds. Eva Braun once commented upon Hitler being more in love with his dogs than with her.
Mein Kampf or My Struggle is Hitler’s autobiography. When you read this book, you experience the madness setting in. The first volume makes some sense while the second, none.
Mein Kampf is available here.
The mass extermination of Jews and other non-Germans by the State of Germany is called the Holocaust (it is also called the Final Solution). The extermination was carried out in phases. Men, women, and children were put into gas-chambers under the pretext of a shower, and were gassed. Children were often used as guinea-pigs for devilish experiments. People who were identified were dispatched to the Nazi concentration camps that had the motto “Work will set you free” on their gates. Auschwitz is said to be the worst of all the concentration camps.
When Hitler arrived in Hell, he must’ve put the Devil in a gas-chamber (or at least on a leash) and ruled Hell…after all, who could be more evil than Adolf Hitler?
I’ll be adding Cleopatra’s cartoon/caricature/sketch – call it whatever you like, today! Have you ever asked yourself, whether Cleopatra was really as beautiful as the movies make her look?!
Abraham Lincoln (Abe Lincoln) was the sixteenth President of the US.
Lincoln was born a farmer’s son in Kentucky, US. When he was just nine, his mother died. Lincoln was mostly self-educated. He married Mary Todd and had five sons, of which only one survived into adulthood. Now the Lincoln lineage is extinct.
Lincoln entered politics early, at the age of 23, but it was in 1860 that he got elected as the 16th President of the US. The very next year, the American Civil War erupted with 11 slave states declaring that they wanted to separate from the US. These states were against the abolition of slavery, and Lincoln’s election campaign clearly defined his stance as anti-slavery. Lincoln is known for leading the US through the Civil War and ending slavery.
Five years after becoming the president of the US, Abraham Lincoln was assassinated in 1865.
Find more Lincoln Quotes at the following links.