The Caricaturist meets and befriends Anthony Tweiner in Atlantis!

New Visitors, Please excuse this idle prattle of a flu-ridden caricaturist who has temporarily lost her ability to appreciate the difference between reality and fiction. Usually she isn’t like this. When sane, she knows that Atlantis is real, Internet is virtual, and the real world is fictitious. If you are here on a serious errand, please don’t waste another precious moment on this post.

  1. If you are looking for caricatures to ridicule a celebrity of your choice, please click the Gallery Icon in the right sidebar.
  2. If you want to learn how to draw caricatures and/or are specifically looking for my book “The Evolution of the Caricaturist”, again check the sidebar, and add your email id in the tiny form given there, or use this link here. I’ll email you when it comes out on the App Store. It is due to arrive there shortly.
  3. If you are wondering why the Interactive tutorials aren’t up yet, it’s because I lost the free fonts that I had used in those tutorials and now I need to replace the fonts, reformat the tutorials, and re-export them before I serve them from my new site.

None of the above?

Then please read on.

Most of my readers know that Atlantis is my favorite blog-holiday destination. When I disappear from the blogosphere, it’s because I’ve snuck off to Atlantis.  I am still here in Atlantis and I am here of my own volition. You don’t have to remind me that the first time that I visited Atlantis ever, it was not because I wanted to, but because I was abducted. You may call it the Stockholm Syndrome, but I developed a soft-corner for my abductors when I realized that all they wanted from me was to create a caricature illustration of a happy couple, which could be given to them as a wedding gift.

I happily complied with their wishes, completed the caricature, enjoyed the party, and went off to bed in a beautiful room that had a huge glass wall on one side. On the other side of this wall was the ocean, and I could see the corals,  the sea urchins, and also a giant vampire squid that had this really scary unblinking stare.  I admit that the wall was slightly unnerving on my first night there, but I soon got used to it.

In fact, I gave the squid a name – Anthony Tweiner. In my humble opinion, the Atlantasian vampire squids are the Sheldon Coopers of sea.  I say this because on my next visit to Atlantis, I requested for the same room and tapped Anthony Tweiner on the glass wall, and Mr. Tweiner, who was nowhere to be seen until then, appeared suddenly, recognized me and dashed towards the wall. Thankfully all his weiners…oops, tweiners (it appears that I can’t get over my tryst with Mr. Anthony Weiner’s caricature,) were neatly tucked in behind him, or he would’ve broken a couple. He was happy…, rather elated…, umm…, actually rhapsodic, to see me back. I too was happy, but about something else. I celebrated his lack of access to an Internet connection or he would have tweeted the closeups of all his tweiners to me – and the kind of open-minded society that Atlantis is, they would’ve told me that it was Mr. Tweiner’s way of paying me a compliment.

Anyway, I don’t want to split my split-ended hair anymore, nor spin a long yarn longer, so to snip them both short – I’ve been visiting Atlantis quite often. And why not? They pay well and they treat me like a queen, because none of the Atlantasians draw (you won’t either, if you were living in a Utopia that had a per capita annual income of $100K (that’s the exact double of the US), no taxes, no sexism, no racism, no terrorism, none of those other myriad -isms that humanity is plagued with.)  They’ve also set up a small studio and office for me to work from, and anointed me as the National Caricaturist of Atlantis. And I must not forget to mention that I’ve got Anthony Tweiner to keep me entertained.

This is why I sneak off to Atlantis whenever I can, my friends.

… …?

What was that?

Why you?

Speak up please. I can’t hear you.

Why you, why not us?

Oh I get it. You are wondering why I get to become to the National Caricaturist of Atlantis, and why not you.

Yes. Why?

It’s simple my friend. I believe in Atlantis, so I get to go there, I get to meet all those cool Atlantasians, I get to befriend Anthony Tweiner, and of course, become their National Caricaturist…

You see, it’s quite like religion. They say if you believe in heaven, you find it; if you don’t then you don’t. If you believe in Atlantis, you’ll find it; if you don’t, you won’t.

So, will I see you here, sometime soon?

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MIB 3 – Men in Black vs. Men in the Back Row a.k.a the Crop of Alien Engineers

Here’s the story.

I watched MIB 3 (that is Men in Black 3). The stress that I put on the word “watched” is deliberate. It is to emphasize that the four engineering students who sat in the row behind me talked so much that I couldn’t hear what Will Smith said to Tommy Lee Jones, nor what Josh Brolin (the younger and more talkative agent K) said to Will Smith…at least during the first half of the movie.

I am curious.

These engineering students (their loud conversation would have me believe that they were studying engineering in one of those zillion weedy engineering colleges of the seedier kind, that have been mushrooming around the country at the rate of 1 college a second.)

This group of Fantastically Foolish Four was there spending money on a movie that none of them understood (yes, I say this despite knowing that there isn’t much to understand in it,) and that they didn’t know anything about (what’s there to know, any way.) The concept of the MIB movies was completely “alien” to them, and for the life of me, I couldn’t understand why they took the last row tickets, sat there for 102 minutes in the dark, if all they wanted to do was giggle (yes, I know girls giggle, guys guffaw – but these guys were experimenting with some sort of role-reversal..don’t ask me why.)

I am not being mean. I am just curious.

While I know that in their kind of engineering college, no engineering is taught; and while I also know that if the education ministry has its way the IITs would soon follow with their crop of half-witted endlessly-giggling students bunking classes to go to movies that they don’t understand – yet, I am not being mean. I just want to know why four guys want to sit and giggle in the last row of a dark auditorium?!

My Take:

  • Every girl who they asked out for a movie, turned them down (individually, I mean…and hope.)
  • There’s no better way of bonding with the guys than to make everyone else in the auditorium miserable.
  • Their Profs are handing out extra points to students who stay out of class (…and away from them. Frankly? If I were their Professor I would. But Internal Combustion Engines are out of fashion now – so I escaped that fate. Thank God!)
  • It was a holiday for them and their parents didn’t want them in the house, so they were given a wad of black-money a kind of currency that’s abundantly available in the country) to splurge.
  • They are planning to emigrate to the USA and they wanted to hone their language skills for a better TOEFL score (Does the TOEFL still exist? I guess it does or I wouldn’t have found the link.)
  • Devil had set an Entrance Exam for them. If they could torture people in the theater, they could join the University of Hell (Do you see? Even the University of Hell has some standards!)
  • It just struck me. Actually, they were preparing for the CET, which is going to replace the esteemed JEE, so that they could get into one of the IITs. Cracking sick-jokes about the MIB is what it takes to crack the CET…right? No pressure…Not at all…Sir!

Summing up:

The saving grace was that the hall was only three-fourth full…so when despite our request the four jokers refused to shut up, we found another place.

MIB 3 – Review:

It’s a good movie…worth-watching. Tommy Lee Jones has aged a lot, so they did a good thing by bringing in Josh Brolin as his younger self. While there weren’t enough new aliens, yet unlike the previous MIBs this one had a better storyline. If you are a fan of the Men in Black, you should definitely watch it. Just make sure there aren’t any alien men behind you – there are…believe it or not…some dialogs in the movie!