Before I begin, let me tell you that the long tail that I am talking about is a funky name for a simple concept.
Most of the people who land on your blog through searches reach there by typing in search terms that aren’t a direct match to your content.
Here are some inspirational long-tail search terms that brought some innocent, unsuspecting visitors to this blog. In this post, I attempt to assuage their hurt feelings by addressing them directly.
Search Term 1: Nobody answers my question, cartoons:
My dear visitor, nobody answers my questions either. I think that we need to start a group of people with unanswered questions and start answering questions for one another. In fact we could swap one question for one answer. What are your thoughts?
Search Term 2: shafali’s cartoon:
Check out the sidebar. That maniacal looking brush-wielding woman with hula hoops in her ears, is Shafali – and the image that you are seeing is an extremely realistic portrait that has an unbelievable likeness to the subject – one of the many Shafalis who burden this Earth with their presence.
Search Term 3: naked avatars:
What?
Naked Avatars?
Whose?
Not of the Gods or the Goddesses or their messengers, I hope, for your sake. If you don’t know what I mean, please read about the Danish Cartoonist Kurt Westergaard, the British Writer Salman Rushdie, and the Indian Artist Maqbool Fida Hussain whose lives became miserable because they attempted to create the naked avatars related to such delicate matters – either realistically or metaphorically. You won’t find that kind of explosive stuff on this moderate caricaturist’s blog.
However, if you are keen on a Non-naked blue-colored, long-bodied avatar of a human-turned Na’vi called Jack Sully, click here.
Search Term 4: football rat cartoon drawings
I have a question.
You want a cartoon drawing of a football-like rat, or a rat playing football, or rat-like football. I like the mouse type of rats who are homey and who prefer to play chess, dine with family, and raise nice educated kid-mice. I am slightly wary of the sword-wielding gladiator mouse, or even the rifle brandishing terrorist mouse…yet they have managed to chew their way into this blog. However, I don’t yet have football playing mice or rat here. Never thought of inviting them over – but thanks for the idea:)
The only time I’ve touched base with football is with this caricature of Troy Polamalu the Pittsburgh Steeler who blocks with his locks (Oh God, please…please…please – let me be right about blocking…or everyone would know that I know nothing about Football!)
Search Term 5: cartoons to draw out difference between force and pressure
This one is easy.
Close your eyes. Now imagine that you are…well…sitting on the toilet seat (a golden one perhaps!). Here’s the difference that you seek to discover:
- Before you-know-what…is pressure,
- during you-definitely-know-what…is force,
- and after you-know-what is – RELIEF!
You got it, didn’t you? Now be a doll, draw that cartoon, and leave me a link 🙂
Search Term 6: joker caricature
You must be joking! A joker’s caricature?! How do you caricature a joker? Uh…oh! You meant Anthony Weiner’s Caricature! But he’s already done a fantastic job of caricaturing himself – trying to beat him at it would be like trying to improve upon perfection.
Search Term 7: definitions of art by known people
You’ve reached the right place, my friend. Click here to read a definition of art by a known person. I am known to my family, my dog, those pesky squirrels in my garden…I am a known person, believe me.
Search Term 8: pen and ink foxes
Pen-and-ink drawings fox me too…and with dogged determination. I mean how do you correct an error in a pen-and-ink? And how do you end up creating all those shades by using only one shade of black! If you find an answer to that question, please leave it here.
Search Term 9: how to draw lady gaga’s outfits
It’s simple. Create a figure drawing of Lady Gaga (or use a cutout from a magazine – it’d serve equally well.) Keep two large buckets of paint handy. One should contain black paint, and the other white paint. Close your eyes. Dip your brush into one of the buckets and splash paint on the drawing. Then do it again, and again, and again. Then open your eyes, and rush into the kitchen. Find that bottle of tomato ketchup, open it up, and from a distance of at least six feet, throw the ketchup on the drawing. Remember to use the ketchup only once.
Every time you repeat this process, you’ll design a new Gaga Outfit…and yes…when you are done, call the spiders to help you spruce up the Lady Gaga outfits you’ve designed.
Search Term 10: prince charles cartooning
Guys and gals, this is news! Prince Charles is one of us! He’s a cartoonist! Imagine how difficult it must have been to keep such a phenomenal skill hidden from the paparazzi for so long? On second thoughts – can we thank Camilla Parker for inspiring him? Or was it Prince William who asked his father to follow his un-princely passion?
Search Term 11: muammar gaddafi 40 outfits
If a god-man can amass so much, what is 40 outfits for a dictator? I think Muammar Gaddafi is a miser who doesn’t spend on himself, he really needs to look towards certain god-men for inspiration!
Search Term 12: animated photos of handsome indian men
I don’t know about the “animated” part, but the term “handsome Indian men” makes me think whether the searcher would have done better by using a more specific search, such as: Hritik Roshan, Amitabh Bacchhan, Dev Anand, Salman Khan…at best a dozen more perhaps? Frankly, I am yet to see a “handsome Indian man” on the streets, though “beautiful Indian women” are aplenty. (I know I know, your son is the handsomest, fairest, and tallest man you’ve ever laid eyes upon, and young women swoon when he rolls past, but anyone other than your son, ma’am?)
(Important Declaration and Clarification: I know that using these terms here would bring some vicarious pleasures-of-the-flesh seeking netizens here, and I’d like to apologize to them for devastating their hopes.)
So what search terms on your blog have made you giggle/guffaw?(girls giggle, guys guffaw – please select what applies – unless you are new-age boy or girl…then you have the right to mix and match!)
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Shafali, you are a riot! I look at some of those searches and wonder how on earth they ever land on my blog! But you have taken the next step and really had some fun with it. Well, done! You have put a big fat grin on my face today!
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I am happy that those searches brought a smile to your face. They must not have made the searchers smile, I am sure:) I just happened to scan my weekly searches and I found myself say, “what the…” (no not what you’d think I was going to say,) and the post just happened. I did have fun writing it.
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By relating giggling with girls, aren’t you stereotyping them? Let them guffaw too. In fact I’d like them to more like us but lately I am observing that they are so different from us and it’s these differences that I find appealing though sometimes, sorry to say, annoying too. This realization struck me like a sudden awakening.:)
About handsome India men, I agree with you. They may be hard to spot but they are there. You call yourself maniacal and a burden on the Earth!? Please don’t.:-)
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That’s precisely why I added the last line. I won’t dare to ask any of the new age girls not to guffaw – in fact, they giggle less and guffaw more; giggling has been taken over by the guys. I’d be happier substituting both with laughter. I think that if men and women stuck to their natural differences they’d be infinitely more appealing to the opposite sex, unfortunately though, we tend to exaggerate some of those differences, turning ourselves into our caricatures.
Thank you for agreeing upon the scarcity of handsome Indian men. I believe we could have a lot more of them if only they concentrate more on being themselves and doing a respectable amount of work, instead of being sloths and gluttons. More work and less food could transform lallu lal lalwani into a handsome young man!
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